# A nice joke **URL:** \ **Category:** Uncategorized\ **Created:** [May 21, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386 "2003-05-21T04:45:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cool\_blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@cool\_blue](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/cool_blue)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/1 "2003-05-21T04:45:58Z")
British voice: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid collision American voice: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision British voice: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. American voice: This is the Captain of US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. British voice: Negative. I say again. You will have to divert your course. American voice: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN.THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES’ ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS.WE DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH.THAT’S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP. British voice: We are a LIGHTHOUSE you moron. And just \*\*\*\* off if you want to save your \*\*\*!! :tb: ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2003, 5:24am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/2 "2003-05-21T05:24:54Z")
Oooh, yeah I’ve seen that one on paper before. Fun at first. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2003, 5:28am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/3 "2003-05-21T05:28:44Z")
Australian voice: ha ha ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2003, 2:13pm UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/4 "2003-05-21T14:13:05Z")
ahahhahaha, that’s awesome. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/5 "2003-05-21T19:24:33Z")
its better with the candadian one though,. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 12:36am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/6 "2003-06-01T00:36:55Z")
=) A British Doctor says, “Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man and put in another and have him looking for work in 6 weeks.” A German Doctor says, “That’s nothing we can take a lung out of one person and put in another person and have him looking for work in 4 weeks.” The Russian Doctor says, “In my country medicine is so advanced we can take 1/2 a heart out of one person and put in another and have him looking for work in 2 weeks.” Not to be outdone, the American Doctor says “You guys are behind. We just took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work and the other half is preparing for war.” ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 12:45am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/7 "2003-06-01T00:45:45Z")
hahaha 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 12:49am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/8 "2003-06-01T00:49:58Z")
Hehehe :thumb: - Soul :s: ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 1:07am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/9 "2003-06-01T01:07:16Z")
Aint the British have the best navy in the world? ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/10 "2003-06-01T03:41:05Z")
um…no that was like over 100 years ago! ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 4:44am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/11 "2003-06-01T04:44:41Z")
> \*Originally posted by Makaveli \* > \*\*um…no that was like over 100 years ago! \*\* I’ve been studying for my US history finals too long… :beam: ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 6:21am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/12 "2003-06-01T06:21:05Z")
Hehe how Arragant can the US Military get hehe jk =) ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 5:13pm UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/13 "2003-06-01T17:13:18Z")
> \*Originally posted by [mdipi.com](http://mdipi.com) \* > \*\*its better with the candadian one though,. \*\* We don’t have a Navy that size to make a joke out of…dumb\*\*\* lol j/k ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 5:25pm UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/14 "2003-06-01T17:25:59Z")
no cause its true iwht the candadian one lol. it wasnt the brittish. but the one that flasherjaz posted is funny too! ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/15 "2003-06-01T18:46:08Z")
Thanx [mdipi.com](http://mdipi.com) Here goes one more… guys i have nothin against america or americans, plz dont think like that, some ppl mite have tht wrong notion about me on that,these are some jokes i got in my mailbox, hope my fellow american frnds/members dont mind dis and just take it as a joke. Thanx =) * * * -An aircraft is about to crash. There are five passengers on board, but unfortunately only 4 parachutes. The first passenger says “I’m Shaquille O’Neill, the best NBA basketball player. The Lakers need me, it would be unfair to them if I died”. So he takes the first parachute and jumps. The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says "I am the wife of the former President of the United States. I am also the most dedicated woman in the world, a Senator in New York and America’s potential future President. She takes one of the parachutes and jumps. The third passenger, George W. Bush, says " I am the President of the United States of America. I have a huge responsibility in world politics. And apart from that, I am the most intelligent President in the history of the country and I have a responsibility to my people not to die". So he takes a parachute and jumps. The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a ten year old schoolboy “I am already old. I have already lived my life, as good person and a priest I will give you the last parachute”. The boy replies “No problem, there is also a parachute for you. America’s most intelligent President has taken my schoolbag…” 😉 * * * ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/16 "2003-06-02T00:54:58Z")
What he was trying to say is that the joke was originally a Canadian lighthouse in nova scotia. Other differences is it was only one U.S. ship. Over the years it’s changed a bit. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://canada1.discourse-cdn.com/flex011/uploads/kirupa/original/3X/6/2/621e5c11736f46532526e61be85940af4230f3e5.png) [@system](https://forum.kirupa.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 2:22am UTC](https://forum.kirupa.com/t/a-nice-joke/21386/17 "2003-06-02T02:22:50Z")
Oh i thought he would want the americans looking smart. I guess i should have figured that for an impossibality lol j/k I LOVE AMERICA who else will save us from invasion