Controlling download of Flash videos

Can anyone tell me how to control the loading of a Flash video.
I’m new to Flash and have created a series of videos, averaging 3-5 min. ea. While everything seems to be working okay, I don’t seem to have any control over whether or not the video is automatically sent to the browser.

Problem is on some of the pages, which contain multiple videos, the page load is extreamly slow regardless of the connection. The videos are set up not to autoplay, but this doesn’t seem to control the download process.

I’m using the AC_RunActiveContent.js provided by Adobe, and it seems to work well, but I need to solve the slow loading. While I know there are many work-arounds, I’d like to avoid the download until the user selects to play the movie.

Thanks in advance.