Kirupa RAPPING?!?!?!?

talk random
1

Windows Paradise
by Kirupa Koolio Diddy

As I navigate through the desktop where I scroll in pain,
I take a look at my screen and realize it’s very plain.
But that’s just perfect for an nerd like me,
You know I shun fancy things like electricity.
At 4:30 in the mornin’ I’m sending e-mails,
Norton checks for virus and Charter fouls, fool
And I’ve been formatting and hacking so long that
Even j00 thinks that my mind is gone.
I’m a man of the land, I’m into overclocking.
Got Bawls! In my hand and a freon on my chin.
But if I finish all of my c++ work, and you finish thine,
Then today we’re going to Tetrinet like it’s 1999.

We’ve been spending most our lives living in a Windows Paradise,
I churn code once or twice, living in a Windows Paradise,
It’s hard work and sacrifice, living in a Windows Paradise,
We sell roms at discount price, living in a Windows Paradise.

A noob maphacked in my Warcraft III game last week,
I just cursed at him, and I called him “weak”.
I don’t really care, in fact I wish him well,
Cause I’ll be laughing my keys off when Blizzard bans him to a cell.
I ain’t never laughed at a noobie even if he desrved it,
An geek that’s rude, you know that’s unheard of.
I never used Linux, but I got a cool Mac,
And my homies agree the monitor looks good in black, fool!
If you come to visit you’ll be bored to tears,
I’ve only played Warcraft III for the past 1.5 years,
But we ain’t really noobs, so please don’t point and stare,
We’re just socially impaired.

We’ve been spending most our lives living in a Windows Paradise,
We’re just plain and nerdy guys, living in a Windows Paradise,
There’s no time for GTA or VICE, living in a Windows Paradise,
We don’t hack, we all play nice, living in a Windows Paradise.

Formatting da computer, hacking lots of code,
Flashed a square on Monday, soon I’ll Flash another!
Think you’re really leet?
Think you’re really smart?
Well I know I’m a million times as leet as thou art.
I’m the nerdy guy the little noobs want to be like
On my keyboard day and night scoring points for the nerdy life.
So don’t be vain and don’t be whiney,
Or else my brother might have to switch field on your screeny.

We’ve been spending most our lives living in a Windows Paradise,
We’re just plain and nerdy guys, living in a Windows Paradise,
There’s no time for GTA or VICE, living in a Windows Paradise,
We don’t hack, we all play nice, living in a Windows Paradise.

2

Well I’d buy it. :stuck_out_tongue:

3

yo i thinkt ahts creative! did you write that?

4

haha
that would be awsome…

my brother owns half a recording studio… shall we do it…?

5

What y’all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin’ time with all the chatroom yakkers?
9 to 5, chillin’ at Hewlett Packard?
Workin’ at a desk with a dumb little placard?
Yeah, payin’ the bills with my mad programming skills
Defraggin’ my hard drive for thrills
I got me a hundred gigabytes of RAM
I never feed trolls and I don’t read spam
Installed a T1 line in my house
Always at my PC, double-clickin’ on my mizouse
Upgrade my system at least twice a day
I’m strictly plug-and-play, I ain’t afraid of Y2K
I’m down with Bill Gates, I call him Money for short
I phone him up at home and I make him do my tech support
It’s all about the Pentiums, what?
You gotta be the dumbest newbie I’ve ever seen
You’ve got white-out all over your screen
You think your Commodore 64 is really neato
What kinda chip you got in there, a Dorito?
You’re using a 286? Don’t make me laugh
Your Windows boots up in what, a day and a half?
You could back up your whole hard drive on a floppy diskette
You’re the biggest joke on the internet
Your database is a disaster
You’re waxin’ your modem tryin’ to make it go faster
Hey fella, I bet you’re still livin’ in your parents’ cellar
Downloadin’ pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar
And postin “Me too!” like some brain-dead AOL-er
I should do the world a favor and cap you like Old Yeller
You’re just about as useless as jpegs to Helen Keller

It’s all about the Pentiums!
It’s all about the Pentiums!
It’s all about the Pentiums!
It’s all about the Pentiums!

Now, what y’all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin’ time with all the chatroom yakkers?
9 to 5, chillin at Hewlett Packard?

Uh, uh, loggin’ in now
Wanna run wit my crew, hah?
Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?
They call me the king of the spreadsheets
Got em all printed out on my bedsheets
My new computer’s got the clocks, it rocks
But it was obsolete before I opened the box
You say you’ve had your desktop for over a week?
Throw that junk away, man, it’s an antique!
Your laptop is a month old? Well, that’s great
If you could use a nice, heavy paperweight
My digital media is write-protected
Every file inspected, no viruses detected
I beta tested every operating system
Gave props to some, and others? I dissed ‘em
While your computer’s crashin’, mine’s multitaskin’
It does all my work without me even askin’
Got a flat-screen monitor, 40" wide
I believe that yours says “Etch-A-Sketch” on the side
In a 32-bit world, you’re a 2-bit user
You’ve got your own newsgroup, alt.total-loser
Your mother board melts when you try to send a fax
Where’d you get your CPU, in a box of Cracker Jacks?
Play me online? Well, you know that I’ll beat you
If I ever meet you I’ll control-alt-delete you
What?

6

that first one is great, I have never heard it before :slight_smile:

Maj - that is one of my favorite Weird Al songs of all time, I think because I like the original song so much. The lyrics are so funny… thanks for bringing back that memory - I think I might have to fire up Kazaa… :slight_smile:

7

this is a must-record rap!

8

Lava/Soul - I think you guys should record it in one of your radio shows :slight_smile: I’m sure some lines will have to be re-written in the first rap thing/song hehe.

9

yeah soul can pretend to be a big pimp from crompton and record it on his pc mic…