this is my favorite:
<Sabdo> on one of those speech-to-text programs my friend ripped *** onto the mic.
<Sabdo> and it typed out “France”
<Sabdo> we were like, wtf?
This isn’t bash.org, it’s actually from an MSN convo with one of my friends, but it sort of fits. 
(It’s trimmed to 96x96 because I wanted to make it fit as a display pic, and I can’t find the original.)
?
<Animaga> so, there’s this panda bear
<Animaga> and he walks into Pizza Hut, orders some pizza, and sits down
<Animaga> once he’s done eating, he takes a look at the bill and just goes to walk out
<Animaga> manager and server try to stop him, saying “you have to pay for your food”
<Animaga> so he pulls out a gun and shoots the place up
<Animaga> the workers are terrified, asking him what the hell he’s doing
<Animaga> he hands them a dictionary, and turns the page to “panda bear”
<Animaga> it says “small black and white bear, native to asia. eats shoots and leaves.”
actually that’s a book I saw in chapters recently - and it has that exact story on the back, only with out the animaga. I can’t remember what it was about, sadly, however it sounded funny.
Well yeah, 99% of the stuff on hash is just stuff they stole from other sources. There’s no way all those nerds are that witty. But it’s still funny
<kolby> learn so grahmar(sp? ;[) and get back to me
hahahhahha
I know which book you’re talking about. It’s actually called “Eats Shoots and Leaves”, a book on grammar and how one phrase can mean other things by simply omitting a comma or two.
that’s it exactly! thanks thor.
<wolf> 1. Save every Free Credit Card Offer you get, Put it in pile A
<wolf> 2. Save every Free Coupon You get, put that in pile B
<wolf> 3. Now open the credit card mail from pile A and find the Business
Reply Mail Envelope.
<wolf> 4. Take the coupons from pile B and stuff them in the envelope you hold
in your hand.
<wolf> 5. Drop the stuffed to the brim envelopes in your mail and walk away
whistling.
<wolf> I have now received two phone calls from the credit card companies
telling me that they received a stuffed envelope with coupons rather
then my application. They informed me that it they are not pleased that
they footed the bill for the crap I sent them. I reply with “It says
Business Reply Mail” I’m suggesting coupons to you to ensure that your
business is more successful. They promptly hang up on me.
<wolf> Now, I did this for about a month before it got boring, so I got an
added idea! I added exactly 33 cents worth of pennies to the envelope
so they paid EXTRA due to the weight. I got a call informing me about
the money, I said it was a mistake and I demanded my change back. After
yelling at the clerk and then to the supervisor they agreed to my
demands and cut me a check for the money. I hold in my hand at this
very moment a check from GTE Visa for exactly 33 cents.
my favourite :love:
ever since we went to dalNet i cant connect 
stupid Cox…kicks can
Have you tried picking a European server? I couldn’t connect using any of the American servers.
Kirupa - think you can give me the server name? Im using XChat and cant seem to find a way to just pick one…
http://www.dal.net/servers/index.php3
the hotspeed one usually works for me
Yeah, hotspeed is the one that I’m always able to connect with.
I also hear a joke about pandas being like men because they both eat shoots, and leaves… //for those on the slow path its refering to men and sex…
Sorry i need to post this one for all us Australians its funny!!
<_kr4m3r> so many ing criminals, its bull
<foniks> heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die <foniks> and showed up like 50yrs later like, “sup?”
<foniks> whatd u think they'd say? <FoSZoR[bg]> something along the lines of, "GDay mate"
<blazemore> LITTLETON, Colo. - Colorado officials plan to try a 15-year-old boy as an adult for allegedly offering a Sony PlayStation to have his aunt killed.
<FlipTopBx> is it modded?
[01:33] (hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amp
[01:33] (hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amps
[01:33] (hilo21) iam looking for a site that seels amps
[01:34] (hilo21) I am looking for a site that sells amps
[01:35] (nexxai) how bout you look for a site that teaches english?
[01:35] (hilo21) **** you
[01:36] (nexxai) Lemme guess, you’d kick my ***, but can’t read the road signs to get to my house?
<reuben> somebody keeps jiggling the doorknob on my front door, then running away
<reuben> i don’t know if i should call the police, or hook up some electricity to the doorknob
<cristobal> why don’t you put ice on the stairs
<cristobal> and heat up the door knob
<cristobal> and swing paint buckets down from your two story foyer
<cristobal> then a few years later, fade from the public eye…
#245718 +(2081)- [X]
<+mOrphz> **** it 
<@Lego> **** it
<+mOrphz> stop that
<@Lego> stop that
<+mOrphz> 
<@Lego>
<+mOrphz> Lego smells
<@Lego> Lego smells
<+mOrphz> /quit
quit: (Lego) (~leet@apex|Lego.user.gamesnet) (Quit)
it’s killing me 
It’s been a long time since I laughed so hard. That site is pure dopeness :crazy:
This thread is the funniest thing I’ve seen all day…mind you its 2:30 in the morning where I live, but I plan on hibernating for the next…12 hours or so it oughta work out. I’m definately going to get into the IRC room sometime…sounds like great entertainment. I’m still laughing from these friggin’ quotes, haha.
hilarious
