In another attempt to impress you guys(shhh…i know you still hate me, and will probably more after this, so really, theres no point i suppose <3<3<3), i’ve written a little bit. Lets just get some stuff out of the way first, i’m an idiot, i’m emo, i’m an attention whore, despite what i preach i care what people think about me, i like coldplay.
The other day a friend and myself were talking about suicide, i get depressed alot, and i mean, a ****ing lot. The conversation started out about me asking if he gets depressed, he answered yeah. Being the pessimist that i am, i started discussing with him about why i was depressed, my current situation, my outlook on life, all that good stuff that nobody(not Nobody) cares about.
Later in the conversation he started saying “I’m just going to kill myself”, which shocked the hell outta me. This kid is my best friend and i probably couldn’t get up every morning if i knew he wasn’t going to be in the world. So imediatly i was like ‘really dude?’ because thats how i approach those types of things. He replies “yeah i guess”. Again, this really shocked me because i considered myself more suicidal than anybody i knew.
So i started doing the only thing i knew how to do, whip out some half-baked philosophy to make him feel better. At first i sympathized with him, talked to him a little bit about “yeah, i mean, we just live, and die, thats it”. He agreed and started talking about the same thing, basically complaining like i do. He said “yeah we just have these things, these little things, i mean, that just get us through our lives, for some people its weed, some people its big cars,etcetc” – “i mean its not worth it right, we just have those little moments of happiness amongst a sea of pain”. (well obviuosly those aren’t his exact words).
He had brought up a good point, that we do just have these little things that make us happy. Thats when we started talking about the meaning of life, i started debating the point that yeah, we do just have these little things. For me its soda, computers, my girlfriend. For him its drugs, hanging out with friends, etc etc. So i just started telling him that those little things, they are the meaning of life. For every 2 minutes of ignorant bliss you have, you have maybe 12 hours of boring life, and maybe even suffering. But when those two minutes come its far better than anything in the whole world, that time has no value in moments like that.
So i’ve come to the conclusion that, any moment where you can achieve happiness even for a few seconds is worth having even if it only comes once a week or once a lifetime. Thats the meaning of life 
