George Bush and his driver were cruising along a country road one night
when all of a sudden they hit a pig, killing it instantly. George told his
driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what had
happened. About one hour later George sees his driver staggering back to the car with a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and his
clothes all ripped and torn. “What happend to you?” asked George. “Well, the Farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar and his 19-year-old daughter made mad passionate love to me.” “My God, what did you tell
them?” asks Bush. The driver replies, “I’m George Bush’s driver, and I
just killed the pig.”
ok i dunno if this one is appropriate, if not just tell me i’ll delete it, or some mod can del it
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?”
Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me capitalism. Your Mom, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the people. The nanny, we’ll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we’ll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,”
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents’ room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, “Dad, I think I Understand the concept of politics now.” The father says, “Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about.” The little boy replies, “Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep ****.”
I’m posting political type jokes because i feel like only posting political type jokes! 
politics sucks
George: Condi! Nice to see you. What’s happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That’s what I want to know.
Condi: That’s what I’m telling you.
George: That’s what I’m asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow’s name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya’ asking me for?
Condi: I’m telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I’m asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That’s the man’s name.
George: That’s who’s name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That’s correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don’t want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And
then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice, here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe weshould send
some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in
the Middle East?
OH GOD! ROFLMAO!
that’s a shrinking head :-
these jokes are too funny for mee!
well gotta start learning russian… got a big test tomorrow!
:x
phil did you make that? thats wicked!
“Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?”
—George W. Bush
na i’m sure you could find plenty on net, Bush is one of the funniest presidents ever…but Cliton was the best!
yes… * I did not have sexual relations with those women…er woman*
who knows how many other secretaries he banged?
anybody remember Jessica Hahn?
How about what’s her name… Flowers?
Isn’t there always someone?
Rev:elderly:
hmmm no?
Me neither…
who are you talking about rev?
If I’m not mistaken, they are females that have brought a lawsuit against Clinton for alledged affairs…
[edit] my memory is bad… Ms. Hahn was Jim Bakker’s downfall (became a playboy centerfold) Jennifer Flowers was Clinton’s “friend” http://www.judicialwatch.org/archive/ois/cases/filegate/begala7.htm[/edit]
Rev:elderly:
everything scandolous has GATE after it now…interesting
George Bush’s twin daughters turned 21 today. Now they can get drunk and not get sent to jail for it anymore. I can’t wait until we get the politicians daughter playboy :). Al Gore’s daughter, the bush twins :).
