Okay, so I’m at work, I work at a call-center for DSL installation.
I have a guy on the phone, who, after doing a bunch of stuff, I get him to the web-site that lets you choose a username and password for your account. There’s a box, that asks for your Phone Number on the screen, to verify your account.
The customer says: “It wants my phone number?”
I say: “Yes, go ahead and enter your telephone number.”
And then I hear: “BEEP-BOOP-BEEP-BEEP-BOOP-BOOP-BEEP-BOOP-BOOP-BOOP” :!:
And then he says: “nothin’ happened.”
I had to mute my phone, to keep him from hearing me hit the floor, and start howling… He punched his number into the phone!! I had to explain to him that the web site was asking him to TYPE the NUMBERS into the BOX ON THE SCREEN with his KEYBOARD, three times before he got it!!! :!:
I couldn’t breath… oh… man… that was so funny…
:beam:
Just wanted to share that with everyone… 
I guess lol is ok, but if they start speaking this annoying 1337 Language,… ARGH
Like this?
Heh heh heh… :beam:
Yes people are stupid but remeber the customer is always right even if you know hes hooribly wrong
The motto we have here at work is:
The Customer is always lying, but act like he’s not.
And its Always true… 
Me: Sir… are you using a router?
Customer: No.
Me: Are you sure?
Customer: Yes. I have a direct connection from your modem to my computer.
Me: Positive?
Customer: I said yes!
Me: Ah. Well… I only ask, because the Ip addresses that your NIC is pulling are set to the standard Router Ip Addresses, and not the Ips that would show you were connected to the modem… which would mean that something’s wrong with your OS, and you’ll have to reinstall windows, and lose all your data, but I can’t help you with that, you’ll need to call Microsoft at-
Customer: Wait a second…
Me: Yes?
Customer: Ah, yes, I forgot, I had, um, plugged in my router again earlier, and told my wife, no, my son to unhook it and he didn’t and…
Me: Ah, so now you no longer have the router connected, right?
Customer: Yes…
Me: And your computer is now showing you’re online?
Customer: yes…
Me: Okay, sir, lets go ahead and finish up this installation.
I know a girl thet insists to say lol instead laugh… with a nasal voice… its really funny! 
btw: miss u Sakuraaaa!
*Originally posted by SeiferTim *
**Customer: Wait a second…
Me: Yes?
Customer: Ah, yes, I forgot, I had, um, plugged in my router again earlier, and told my wife, no, my son to unhook it and he didn’t and… **
Aihaiuhaiauha! :ne:
Its almost possible to see the costumer face:
"No, its not plugged… :sigh: "
[SIZE=1]I said lol out loud once. Someone in school said something funny while walking, so he had to turn around to say it, so by the time he had ended telling the joke, he had turned around again so he couldn’t here me laughing and say ‘lol’.
I didn’t know where it came out of. 
It was just…suddenly there. Popped up from out of nowhere. Although nobody heard it, I was embaressed to death and thought of myself as a meganerd ;( After that, it never happened again. I probably supressed it for the rest of my life deep inside :ne:
Right. So…glad to get this off my chest. Time for the brainwashing gun bzzzeeeep [/SIZE]
OMFG!
That is so extremely funny!
Hahahahah!
Man what a great story Tim! I love how dumb people are in this era!
My mom is extremely slow with computers… "Surge! How do I get in the internet? Uhh mom, you mean you want to go on the browser, right? Oh yes that thing Click on that huge icon that says Internet Explorer."
Then it takes her about an hour just to get to the desired website… Oh man its hilarious!
Thanks
grinch:kir:
My other favorite lie is about the filters.
In order for the DSL modem to get the DSL signal out of the phone line, you have to install a filter on every phone jack thats in use, to keep the dsl signal off the phones. This also blocks out the modem noises on the phone.
Having a device plugged in without a filter, even a phone you never use, will either weaken the signal, or keep the modem from getting the signal, and a sure sign of this is that you can hear a loud beeping - clicking noise on all the phones.
Customer calls in, and right off the bat, I can hear the modem noise, so I know a filter is not missing, or they plugged something into the DSL side of a filter:
Customer: Yeah, this **** modem won’t stop blinking on DSL, and I can’t get connected. Says: “Time Out”
**Me: **I do apologize, Ma’am. Did you happen to install your filters already?
Customer: YEah, I put a filter on all my phones!
**Me: **Okay, how many phones do you have in the house?
Customer: I dunno, 3 or 4…
Me: and they are all filtered?
Customer: Yeah
Me: Okay, What about the cable you’re using? Its the same one we sent you? (the longer the phone cable from the jack to the modem, the more attenuation, and the weaker the signal. Since I hear the modem on the phone, I know this isn’t the current problem, but I always check anyway. Some people go out and by 500 ft of phone cable from radio shack, run it from the basement, through the attic, and into the computer room, and can’t figure out why they can’t get online…)
Customer: yeah, its your cable…
**Me: **Alright. Do you have any Alarm systems, or Sattalite systems that use the phone line at all?
Customer: No.
**Me: **Alright… can you double check all your filters, and make sure the opening that says “DSL” is empty, except where your DSL modem is plugged in?
Customer: Alright [puts phone down…after a while] Yeah, their fine…
**Me: **And there are no other phones, or phone devices anywhere in the house?
Customer: Right… I’m about fed up with this! I’m about to send this crap back!
**Me: **Okay, okay… um… lemme see… [run some tests, which, of course, come back saying that we can’t find the modem at all] Hmm… now, the noise on the phone… do you hear it?
Customer: Yeah… this modem is messing up my phones!
Me: Well, the only time that we would hear this, is if you don’t have something filtered, which we’ve ruled out, or if your lines in the house are wired wrong, and somethings crossing… I can make up a ticket to send someone out to take a look at it for you, so that they can fix the problem.
**Customer: ** Is that going to cost me?!
**Me: ** Well, we’re not really allowed to quote a price… since its another department doing the work… but I’ve heard that it can be around $150, and up…
Customer: …
**Me: ** …Ma’am?
**Customer: ** …can you hang on for a second?
**Me: ** Sure thing…
After some banging around I hear a click, and the modem noise disapears on the phone
**Customer: ** Hello?
**Me: ** Yes?
**Customer: ** I forgot, that my daughter had hooked up a phone in her room, and I told her to put one of these filters on her phone, and she never listens to me!
**Me: ** I see… and your modem lights?
Customer: Green…Green…Green…
**Me: ** Uh-huh. Okay, then we’ve got Synch, now we can finish up and get connected.
:beam:
I like how they always told someone to do something, and they didn’t. They’d rather lie about someone else, then admit to their mistakes. It’s classic
