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trying to link two different swf on a same window - not sure it can be done but javascript could help…
If it’s just a menu (ie not your whole site done in flash) all you have to add is the getURL function to your buttons, and they will load in another _frame) -
It’s all about optimization, using the right progs (such as swift 3d - which turns 3d into flash and makes ‘light’ animations)… Vector images are not as ‘heavy’ in size are raster (bitmap) images are - you can abuse of them =)
plus usually these people have good hosting - which means speed os always optimized…