Lord of the Rings / The Return of the King

Return of the King is coming out tomorrow. Whos going? We’re all taking off from work to see an early afternoon showing in the new columbia mall theater which is opening that very day (tomorrow) :pleased:. Im quite excited.

To start things off, heres a list of the top 21 things NOT to do while watching Lord of the Rings:

  1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, “Wait…where the hell is Harry Potter?”
  2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming, “YOU…SHALL…NOT… PASS!” - After the movie, say “Lucas could have done it better.”
  3. Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says, “the Ring.”
  4. Point and laugh whenever someone dies.
  5. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.
  6. Finish off every one of Elrond’s lines with “Mis…ter Ander-sonnn.”
  7. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, “And I did it… MY way…!”
  8. Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone’s finger and fall down the stairs.
  9. Dress up as old ladies and reenact “The Battle of Helms Deep,” Monty Python style.
  10. When Denethor lights the fire, shout “Barbecue!”
  11. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout, “RUN FOREST, RUN!”
  12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: “That’s what I’m Tolkien about!” See how long it takes before you get kicked out of the theatre.
  13. During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, “Where’s Waldo?”
  14. Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.
  15. Start an Orc sing-a-long.
  16. Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.
    17 When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for a tense moment and shout, “I see dead people!”
  17. Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.
  18. Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.
  19. Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.
  20. When Shelob comes on, exclaim, “Man!Charlotte’s really let herself go!”

12 is my favorite :stuck_out_tongue: Thats what Im TOLKIEN about!

Ren: Yeah Pippin and Merry became “assistants” to both leaders of gondor and rohan! But Pippin really was great… perhaps he was a dormant genius?

i hear what you guys are sayign about the azzes in the theater. i went to see last samurai the other night, and every time anythign even remotely violent would happen (which was liek, every 5 mins) these stoopid prisses would squeal and make stoopid noises… in excess… i wanted to kill them

Awesome movie.

****ing amazzing movie. The movie was so good i didnt’ even notice the *******s sitting behind me talking and being rude the whole movie. This trilogy has surpassed the original star wars in my mind. I cant’ wait to have this one on dvd and spend a whole day watching them back to back like i did as a kid with star wars.

*Originally posted by RenaissanceGirl *
**I’m afraid so my friend. But the extended DVDs haven’t disappointed me so far, so I’m confident it’ll be there. So even though it’s over - there’s still something to look forward to. I feel a little like the theatrical versions put the hobbits on the backburner (except for Frodo, obviously) but I am quite pleased with the third installment. Especially the treatment of Pippin - man, Pippin rocks the kaz! **

Ya exactly it was nice to see all the hobbits brought into the fore front of this last film. There story is more compleing then the Arwin/Aragorn love story crap that the for some reason centered on.

you think they centered on that? I didnt get that feeling at all. I almost wish there was more because it seemed a little detatched and uninformed in respect to about everything else.

I don’t think the story focused on any particular character. The story’s focus was always on the Fellowship. But in particular, I think, is in this order: Aragorn, Gandalf, Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin, Gimli and Legolas, Boromir!

Also I think the love story of Arwen and Aragorn is essential! It describes also the love story of Luthein and Beren from the Silmarillion and history of the Dunedain!

*Originally posted by sintax321 *
**There story is more compleing then the Arwin/Aragorn love story crap that the for some reason centered on. **

Amen to that! I know Jackson had to make some necessary changes and a lot of it was quite understandable but this was one I didn’t like too much. I didn’t want this beloved story to turn into a frickin’ Meg Ryan movie!

I saw it again yesterday. I can’t get enough.


Hell, I love that scene where everyone bows down to the midgets… er… hobbits :D… its like these little people who have (or are thought to have) no significance in the large land of middle earth are suddenly respected and saluted and bowed down to by the kingdom of men… sweeeeeet… the dead people were cool too… although it was a bit like pirates of the carribean “savvy?”…

the OLIPHAUNT!!! not elephant… OLIPHAUNT riding scene was tight, but even tighter was the look on gimli’s face when he came back down! LOL…

I still believe the love story part is essential! :-\

agreed, and it doesnt even come close to overwhelming the movie with its presense. Someone should count the screen time of those scenes.

Top Ten Dumb Guy Complaints About “The Lord of the Rings”

  1. “I expected something, you know, more Hobbity”

  2. “‘Middle Earth’ scenes clearly shot on regular Earth”

  3. “It was real long and not a cartoon”

  4. “Accidentally put butter on my Twizzlers”

  5. “My name is Stu – how come there aren’t any Hobbits named Stu?”

  6. “Where the hell is Chewbacca?”

  7. “If they’re going to have magic, why not bring back the rapping kangaroo?”

  8. “Couldn’t focus on movie – kept thinking about how I blew all my money on the Giants”

  9. “I kept trying to talk to Frodo, but he ignored me like he’s ‘all that’”

  10. “I haven’t seen it yet – I’m too busy governing California”

I just plain out thought the movie was awesome! :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

aye, that it was :beam:

watched it tonight…

amazing… :drool:

The trilogy is not for people who are mostly into mediocre and even stupid genres. Though all are invited to experience a truly epic saga. It is sad too see that only a few can appreciate the quality of the films. The people of the world have shown their quality and a lot of them are not very good!

Twas a bit overdone in my taste - CGs were near perfect (xcept when they lit the bonfires) but here are some thing that sort of bugged me:

  • the elf, orlando bloom, is bloody useless - just does forcast
  • the big orc-elephant scene looked like AT-ATs on Hoth in the Empire strikes back
  • Smogul’s ANNOYING voice… myyyyyy preciouuuuuus
  • You gotta love how the blond chick gets dumped (“I cannot give you what you want - Im just a shadow”)
  • The same music was played over and over
  • Dont you burn when you’re sitting on a volcano ?
  • An army of ghosts… wtf ?
  • The wraith guy gets beaten by a simpleton (the blond chick) deceived me a bit - that guy looked invincible…
  • The halflings fighting were pretty cool actually…

just my two cts

See what I mean? :sure: