Old comedy gags

Anyone got any old classics?

  1. Must be short to work well
  2. Please quote the source if known
  3. Keep it clean people :worried:

Ah, Tommy Cooper…

“Cos it’s strange, isn’t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go ‘Aaaaaaagghhhh’ and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.”